Up Close and Personal (video)

My first video message to you:

I have missed my calling. I think I should have my own talk show televised from the stairs of my house. It could be called "Live with Beth and Tripod."

There is something about taking charge, putting yourself in the driver's seat of your life, that makes you feel empowered. We've all been in that spot where we believe we are victims of our circumstances. We think, "Oh well, it will never get better than this. This crap I call my life is just my fate."

Wrong. But you have to be the right place for change and forward movement.

Now, let's apply this to me, because it is all about me, and my life is just that fascinating.

Eight weeks, five days, ten hours and 13 minutes ago I incurred a stress fracture in my cuboid bone. Never heard of the cuboid bone? Me neither. I don't think it's really a bone. Anyway, this has been my "story" for the past 2 months. I made it who I was. The girl who loves to run and couldn't run the race she'd been training for.

I read something yesterday that put things into perspective:

Events reveal people's characters; they don't determine them. If two people are hit by a bus and crippled for life, one will become a bitter shut-in; the other, the kind of warm, outgoing person whom everyone loves to be with. It's not about the bus. You have the chance to be the person you wish to be, until you die.

Are you a bitter shut-in?

Maybe I'll write a book called, "It's Not About the Bus."

And now I've GOT A PLAN.

Although I can't really start any "real" sort of running for a few more weeks, my goal is to do the Colorado Marathon on May 9. Working backwards from this date, I've come up with what my training will look like going forward (you can tell I am totally following the ten percent rule this time. I am going to worship this rule like my own personal Jesus, especially if it keeps me from injury). I hope to be an example of someone who started out really small (walk 2 mins, run 3 mins), and got really big (marathon).

Week one:
walk 2, run 3
walk 2, run 3
walk 1, run 4

Week two:
walk 1, run 4
run 20 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 20 mins @9 min/mile pace

Week three:
run 20 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 22 mins@9 min/mile pace
run 22 mins @9 min/mile pace

Week four:
run 22 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 25 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 25 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 25 mins @9 min/mile pace

Week five:
run 27 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 27 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 27 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 30 mins @9 min/mile pace

Week six:
run 30 mins @9 min/mile pace
run 30 mins @9 min/mile pace

From here I'll move onto a 14 week marathon training plan. Then I can work on increasing speed and getting back to where I was pre-injury. And by May 9, 2010, hopefully I'll be back to this:

Me running a race with my dress flowing in the wind. My kids cheering me on. The Rocky Mountains as my back drop. An iPod growing out of my left tit. My fists balled into sweating lumps. Photos stolen from Brightroom.

Yes, my plan looks kind of boring. Yes, it is very slow going. I am not a patient person. I don't do things gradually. But I have no choice.

What are you trying to be patient about today?

I Thought I Was Done Lactating

The Rock 'n Roll San Antonio Marathon has come and gone. No, I didn't run. Don't you read anything I write? What do you have, like a blog roll of 60 blogs you like to skim?


I tried not to mope the whole time even when every person in the whole town was wearing a medal and a race shirt and doing the marathon shuffle. I did have my moments of general bitchiness and even broke down in tears when we saw the first marathoners come across the finish. I just kept thinking, "That should be me." Despite not being able to run the race, there were some pros to the trip:


Wearing this in the elevator as I came down from the pool I got lots of weird looks. It would seem I am the queen of all lactators:

Great scenery in the BBQ restaurant. Glad the crack decided to behave and stay put:

I taught my son to drink root beer the way you do in college (with your eyes closed in pure enjoyment):

I got to watch my mom experience her first porta potty (she usually just leaves a pile on the sidewalk):

Santa ended up running the race:

I got to see other Alamo (not the car rental place):

So you see, it wasn't all that bad. And in all seriousness, Ken (husband) and Julie (BFF) ran a great half marathon. Ken ran in 1:52, Julie in 1:36. They are studs. That's me in the middle. The one with no marathon bib, no medal:

The weekend was not without pitfalls.

• I found out it is by far easier to run a marathon than to navigate your way across thousands of runners and closed roads to the finish line. We need to salute our supporters more.
  
• My daughter, 8, got lost in the hotel for about 5 minutes and I had one of those mother freak out moments that no one likes to witness


• Said daughter got sick and ended up with a urinary tract infection (thanks hot tub). We spent the morning in this lovely clinic in downtown San Antonio. I think I got a urinary tract infection myself just sitting there.


• Some kid threw up behind me on the plane (vomiting is my very worst fear and gross out)

Other than that: perfection!!

Now it is time to look towards the future my friends!!! By January I will be training again. I'm thinking of running the Colorado Marathon in May. I just watched the movie, Ultra Marathon Man about when that Karno dude ran his 50 marathons in 50 days in 50 states and then pulled some crap like running to Missouri the next day after he finished. Anyway, Karno made a good point:

"You have to keep moving forward. If you don't, you're stagnant and then you die."

I leave you with that. Don't die.

Check Out My Slit

I took my son for his 12 year old physical today. He got fondled. Did they do this when we were 12? I laugh at this questionnaire the kids have to fill out for the doctor. Questions like: what do you spend your money on? How do you get your money? How do your parents show you they are mad at you? It would be a great candid camera to have a kid answer: "I get my money from selling drugs and spend it on weapons. My parents show me they are mad at me by stealing my drug money."

Now onto running:

In my quest to bounce back from this stress fracture injury, I've been doing a lot of reading about how to be smart next time. Not that I was completely ignorant, but I constantly pushed myself to the point of crapping (sometimes under bridges, sometimes in bushes, sometimes, well I didn't make it), didn't cross train (except some yoga), ran back to back days all week long, didn't take my calcium, changed shoes just because I felt like it without making sure they were the best fit, raced and raced and raced and...well, I guess I was completely ignorant.

Here's what I have learned, fellow runners. I know most of you know this, but there is always room for a reminder:

• Gradually increase distance, intensity and frequency. 10% rule. Don't increase any of these by more than 10% at a time. Big Fat Fail for me. I upped my speed and frequency and distance all at once. Right before I got injured I ran ten miles one day, 18 miles the next day (at marathon pace), 6 miles the next day (fast), then major major speed work (9x800). Then ouch, hey my foot hurts. No shit.


• Be careful of excessive downhill running. I didn't do too bad on this one, but did the Georgetown to Idaho Springs Half Marathon (all downhill in the Colorado mountains) then the next week ran the relay in Oregon.


• Adequate rest between workouts. Total fail for me.


• Fewer hard surface runs. I did okay on this one. Did lots of trails.

And just food for thought. Did you know 80% of running injuries are caused by too much of an increase in mileage?

I am going to make a confession here. Sometimes when I would read your blogs and hear of your long distances, fast times and PRs, I would feel the need to keep up. To push harder, rather than doing what was right for my body. Lesson learned. Be where you are.

Tomorrow is indeed another day. There is no telling if another injury awaits me in my future, but I'm going to work hard and diligently to avoid it. Trying to BQ after only running for the past year or so might have just been too much. I plan to be running for a very, very long time. I plan on running a marathon at the Great Wall of China. I want to run the Athens Marathon, following in the footsteps of Pheidippides and returning to the place where I went to high school. I want to do an ultra someday, running the famous Comrades 87km race in South Africa. I need to keep my body strong for all that I have in store for it. I am competing only against myself and I need to not compare, not judge, not let my ego take over.

What are your great future running plans? Where is your dream place to run a race? How will you take care of yourself to make sure you get there?

BTW, for all you inquiring minds, my cute new party dress is from Forever21. Yes, I know. I am 42. So I call it ForeverDouble21 and it's all good.

I close with a picture of me getting ready to see Wicked this weekend. What a wicked slit I have in my skirt, eh? Forever Double 21!!

PS: Check out this giveaway!

New Dress, New Attitude?

We're leaving for San Antonio on Friday. Leaving for the race I will not run. Leaving for the Boston qualifier marathon in which I will not BQ. In all honesty, I kind of wish we were not going. I thought by this point I would be at peace with not running the race and would feel inspired to cheer on Ken and Julie. While I am happy to be there with/for them, I am not at peace with not running. In fact I am at war with not running. I need to try to change my attitude.

To do so, I bought a new party dress. My stress fracture already feels better. I am so popular that I have two Christmas parties to attend. One with my husband. One with my friend who is getting divorced and didn't want to go alone. Okay, that doesn't qualify me as popular, but I'm trying.


The party dress is not too unlike my new running dress that I wore when I injured myself. I don't think it was the dresses' fault, however.


I wonder if I could run in my new party dress. Or party in my new running dress. It would look cute with thigh high boots I'm sure (better than those slippers).

Today I did my 20 minutes on the treadmill for a total of 16 minutes of walking and 4 minutes of running. I felt I should wear a sign telling everyone that it's not that I get tired after one minute but that I am injured. What an ego I have. Why do I even care? I think it is more about me telling myself that I could run further if I wanted. But instead I am making a choice to take care of myself.

Yes, yes I know. Baby steps. I bet a baby could run more than four minutes. I'm just saying.

I leave you with this video of my son jamming to AC/DC at his drum concert this weekend. Has nothing to do with running, but it makes me smile.

Now You're Just Teasing Me

I should be grateful that I went to the doctor yesterday and he told me I could run. I am seven weeks out from my stress fracture. This is what I've been waiting for, right? Yep, except that I had no clue how gradual it would be re-introducing running to my repertoire. As in:

3x per week, go out for 20 minutes, walk 4 minutes, run 1 minute, repeat

You know it and I know it. It is complete torture to a runner to be taunted with running one minute at a time. One minute!!! Are you kidding me? That's a bad joke. That's like letting Jamoosh, Vanilla and my husband watch only the first three seconds of this video. It's just an unfair tease.

It continues from there. I won't really be running until the end of December. Can't start training for any races until January. My advice to you: never get a stress fracture. It sucks. It takes forever to get on your feet again. If you have to get a stress fracture, get one in your finger or your cheekbone. That way you can still run.

Don't get me wrong. I see the big picture. I know I will be back soon. Just trying to be patient.

I made my son go with me today on my walk/run. Here I am before we left. I am smiling because I am going to run. For. One. Stinking. Minute:

I just wrote another article. This one is most appropriately on the topic of common running injuries. Not that I have that on the brain or anything.

BTW, thanks for all the feedback on whether to sell my marathon bib or not. I am chickening out. It's not worth it to me to take the chance of being forever hated and black balled by the RnR people. I'll just suck it up and hope I find $110 laying on the sidewalk in San Antonio.

Nice Jugs

Just at the grocery store. The guy, Carl, bagging my groceries asks (referring to my milk and OJ) if I "want my jugs in a bag." Funny to hear Carl talking about my jugs. The little things really make my day.

It has been 45 days since my last run. But only 16 hours since my last glass of wine.

So, here's the big question. You all know I can't run San Antonio in 10 days due to my stress fracture. We are going anyway because Ken (husband) and Julie (BFF) are going to run the half. I emailed the Rock 'n' Roll people and told them about the injury and begged for a credit towards another RnR race. They politely, yet firmly, said "No." They did, however, say I could have my t-shirt from the marathon. Just what I want. Another cotton race shirt and one from a race I did not/could not run. A reminder of this whole fiasco. Basically a $110 t-shirt. If I wanted to pay that for a t-shirt I would go to Abercrombie and Fitch.

I am thinking this no credit business is really lame. I get that they have a no refund/credit policy since some people might just drop out cause they didn't train or decided not to run. Not me. I wanted to run. Was dying to run. Would practically cut off my left jug to run. Even offered a doctor's note to prove myself.

So, what do I do to get back at the RnR people? I post on craigslist that I want to sell my bib for $60. A good deal. There are quite a few other people trying to sell their bibs. I've gotten several responses. I realize, of course, that my name will be attached to and defined by whatever person - be it slow ass who runs a 6 hour marathon or speedy stud who runs a 3 hour marathon - runs in my name. I also realize I could qualify for Boston without even running if said person is a speedy stud. But, really, I could not and would not do that. WHEN I BQ, it will be on my own merits.

Back to my question that was started several paragraphs up there: have you ever sold a bib? I know it is frowned on greatly by the race folks. Ken also said I might get black listed/black balled from the RnR people if they found out and they wouldn't let me run future races. Could be, but I don't see them turning down any one's money. What would you do? Suck it up and lose the money or take your chances and sell the bib?

These are things making me happy today. I just booked our trip to Mexico for spring break (this place is awesome, by the way.) Son is back at school after only 3 days of illness. Candy cane and Gingerbread Spice teas are out in the grocery store. I might, might be able to run on Friday. Modern Family is on tonight. My jugs attracted the attention of the bagger at the grocery store.

Last year's trip to Mexico:


Happy hump day if you know what I mean.

Once a Runner

Well, child #1 is down with what seems to be H1N1. Thought we might escape, but no such luck. At least this illness was nice enough to wait until after his birthday and Halloween to hit. I hate it when my kids are sick. I worry like crazy. I know he'll get better, I know it will pass, but he's my baby (even if he is 12) and I worry. That's what us mamas do.

I went for my first road bike yesterday since the fated injury. Only did 15 miles, but it was windy with snow still on the ground and I just wasn't feeling it. I rode up towards the foothills. As I did the big turnaround to head home, this huge peleton of dudes screamed past me leaving me in the wake of their whooshing pedals and their talk about horse shit on the road. I was a lonely rider on a lonely road. I started counting the road kill and thinking that if I were a taxidermist, this would be an ideal way to gather my specimens. I kept a pretty good pace going the whole way (16-20 mph), really wanting to get and keep my rpms up.

What I found is: this bike ride made me miss running even more. In fact, I passed a runner along the lonely road and I longingly gazed in his direction - wishing it were me. My question to you is: what is it about running that does it for us? Really gives us that high? Cycling is challenging and speedy and there is no better place than Boulder County, CO to be on your bike. Yet, it is missing something for me. Maybe it's feeling my feet on the pavement, feeling grounded. Maybe it is that running seems so pure to me: no gear required, just me and my shoes (and a few articles of clothing). It is hard to put into words, but running bests everything else for me. Can you put it into words?

Today I got his book from the library. I've read so many of the running books, but not this one. Runner's World calls it, "the best book ever written about running." So, sit tight and I'll give a review here in a couple of days. If you've read it, let me know what you thought.

I also learned that there is a documentary on Dean Karnzes' book about running the 50 marathons in 50 days. It's appropriately called "Ultramarathon Man." I just ordered it from Netflix. I'm a total sucker for this kind of inspirational stuff. Here's a teaser.

Happy November. Happy it's already dark and it's only 4:45pm day.